The Left’s Social (Ir)responsibility…

Social responsibility: The idea that while we enjoy many individual freedoms, we cannot do just whatever we please to the detriment to our community.

I think we all embrace this concept to varying degrees despite debating the more subtle nuances. For example, many agree that your freedom to drink and drive ends when another person’s safety begins, or as some may argue, albeit far more contentiously, that vaccinating yourselves and your kids is a social responsibility toward herd immunity against disease for those who cannot get vaccinated for various reasons. Even minor daily things like basic manners and consideration of others could fall under a sort of micro version social responsibility. While we all agree we should be considerate of those around us, the problem starts when our personal freedoms get smaller and smaller all in the name of “social responsibility”. It’s a delicate balance between our right to personal choices, and others’ rights in a collective society that may affect the choices we as individuals can make for ourselves without thinking of everyone else’s needs too. In this “land of the free”, freedom should be paramount, but to live in a cohesive society, we all need to take into account the needs of the group, not just each individual.

Personally, I’m for the idea that we must do everything we can to preserve the maximum amount of freedom of personal choice as possible and some of our personal choices can ethically outweigh the needs of the group. However, I cannot go so far to say we owe nothing to contributing to a smooth and cohesive society as a whole either, such as in the case of being “free” to endanger others by driving drunk for instance. Never the less, attempts to restrict individual freedom in the name of “social responsibility” can lead down a dangerous slippery slope when the powers that be use it as an excuse to slowly take away our freedoms. This argument however, is often used by the Left against conservatives. Whatever social agenda they wish to push, they always pull out the collective responsibility card to further restrict our freedoms or demand more entitlements such as your tax money for welfare, forced indoctrination of your children, and social agendas that feel good rather than do good.

The ironic, but perhaps not surprising thing anymore is, like most of the Left’s hypocrisy, they ought to look in the mirror when speaking of social responsibility! The Left wants and demands to be given the choice to feel entitled to have hook up culture, enable welfare cradle to grave, force their agendas on the next generation and control everything they think, take away our means of defense, demand someone’s personal choice outweighs the interests of society and such. Here are some prime examples:

A person’s own personal choice to be transgender is lauded by the Left, and now demands that the rules of biology, evidence based science, and all of society must be turned on its head for those who want to redefine the norm so they can feel normal. They say that it’s a personal choice that harms no one, and that all the hoopla over the issue is a right-wing conspiracy and sexist. After all, who does it hurt if a man wants to live and identify  as a woman? Why should we care if a dude wears a dress and renames himself Susie? Why can’t there be more than a gender binary view of human nature? However, it’s not that simple.

Living as a woman with the expectation that you, a biological male, are entitled to enter women’s private spaces, compete with masculine strength on women’s sports teams, and such has consequences beyond just your own personal lifestyle choices. If it were simply about one’s personal choices, I’d have no issue at all, but that’s not the case. Women have been endangered before when perverts assaulted them in bathrooms and changing rooms pretending to be transgender. Biological male athletes on women’s teams have significantly out competed their fellow women in endurance and strength. On the flip side, trans men who are biological women do not have the requisite strength and endurance in male dominated fields such as the armed forces. Not to mention simply the idea of one feeling entitled to redefine the norm and what is factual based on their own personal feelings! So no, transgender people’s personal decisions do affect others around them yet the Left cries “personal choice” when confronted with that reality while ignoring the detriments to society. If you want to argue that communal welfare outweighs personal choices, then why not in this case?

Or consider the example of the Left’s promotion of promiscuity to young women to “get ahead” and be “empowered”. Treating sex as a handshake, a mere commodity instead of a milestone for a young woman has real and lasting detriments. It’s not, as many perceive the issue, about nosy prudes sticking their noses in everyone’s business! There are reasons why sex on a whim and confusing promiscuity with empowerment is detrimental beyond arbitrary edicts, attitudes and cultural taboos. The Left says sexual freedom must be paramount for women to be equal to men, but they forget: with freedom comes responsibility!

Yes, your personal choices regarding your sexual activity do matter for society. They matter for all the unwanted oops babies born to parents with nothing to offer them and no resources to care for them, adding a drain on services to feed, clothe, educate and provide healthcare for these children. Speaking of healthcare, isn’t it a drain on the system to be flooded with patients needing treatment for their STD’s, prenatal care and yes, abortion? What about all the misunderstandings that can arise out of murky situations regarding consent and willingness the police and courts have to deal with? All the criminal cases when she hooks up with the wrong guy? Or conversely, the young men now at risk for a false allegation that will destroy his life? What about all the young women being brainwashed into the idea that sex is a handshake and mistake exploitation for empowerment? It’s not just between you and your partner anymore when you bring 1000+ liabilities to the bedroom whenever you choose to hook up? Society did not “consent” to clean up the mess you made when you had your little slip up last night!

My last but certainly not the final example of the Left’s hypocrisy regarding social responsibility is the welfare system. They say we owe our fellow society members in need a helping hand. And if everyone were motivated to give it and pass it forward too that’s fine. The issue is though, many take clear advantage of the welfare system despite families in need who need it legitimately. The welfare system is now really the welfare state, one where families are enables to live cradle to grave off welfare with no thoughts of further career choices. Instead of using food stamps for food to feed their wife and children, they exchange them for drugs. Instead of wanting an honest job, they are content to collect our tax dollars then raise their kids to do likewise. Instead of coming to America to work, they come for our handouts while homemaking widows, starving children, wounded veterans and their families, that family who just needs this month’s rent to secure that job interview and get back to self sufficiency, etc… are denied what welfare is REALLY supposed to be for! One must ask: What about their responsibility to society to be self sufficient and earn their living rather than leech off of everyone else’s hard work?

All in all, the Left likes to cry “social responsibilities” when we ask for personal freedoms, yet ignores how they hurt society by letting people feel entitled to do what the want regardless of the consequences for society to bear. Society is NOT here to clean up and subsidize your poor choices! We, society, are not here to clean up the mess you made by:

Your unwanted pregnancies

Your STD’s

Your nasty divorce and custody battle requiring extensive therapy for your traumatized kids

Your addiction you pass off as an involuntary disease

Your choice to live as a woman then demand access to women’s spaces endangering REAL women

Living off welfare cradle to grave on OUR tax dollars

The laws that stops law abiding gun owners from defending society

Teaching a generation that what feels good matters more than what does good

And many others!

See? The best thing about embracing personal choice over societal obligations is personal choices get personal consequences 😉 You make the choice: You own it. Society should not be obligated in any way to clean up one’s own personal mess!

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Ladies, Be Empowered!

This is addressed to my fellow women out there. I’ve covered much of the flaws of feminist thinking, especially along #MeToo lines in sexual assault prevention, which is basically zero. I’ve also covered in several articles my argument for more personal accountability to lessen one’s risks of assault as well as holding the perpetrator accountable too. Look, I know this topic isn’t all that pleasant, and very serious, but it must be addressed head on. I agree with the Left that misconceptions are a roadblock to empowering women to fight back against sexual assault, but I argue that it is in fact their side, that is fostering dangerous misconceptions about sexual assault.

Their basic premise is that too often, we shift the blame on the victim rather than the perpetrator and even go so far as to say we created a “rape culture” where rape is not only tolerated, but thought of as a man’s “right”. They say that the only thing that causes rape is the rapist, and nothing else. Therefore, one cannot talk about how alcohol or drugs play a role. Nor other poor risky choices such as becoming isolated or suggestive behavior/dress. Now, I will say that they are correct that one does indeed, need a rapist, to commit rape. Alcohol, sexy clothes, drugs, partying, does not literally cause a rape to happen, just as gun violence can only happen if someone pulls the trigger. However, the above factors do indeed create an increased risk of victimization, and are correlated with incidents of sexual assault.

Rapists are going to rape no matter what, because if you are at the point where you feel entitled to rape someone, you don’t care one bit about how it will impact your victim. You may not even care what they are wearing either, as many argue rape is more about power than sexuality. However, barring any empathy for your victim, you still have to choose one! So, which girl, if you would put yourself in the mindset of a callous rapist, but doesn’t want to get caught, would you choose? The girl who’s sober, more modestly dressed surrounded by 5 other girlfriends, (a.k.a. witnesses) at the party, or the one who’s almost blackout drunk, isolated, and in suggestive clothing that can be used as an excuse later in court in your favor? Who do you think would be noticed more if missing? Who do you think would put up less of a fight?

Now, does either girl deserve to get raped? Absolutely not! No one ever “deserves” rape, and nothing ever “justifies” rape. However, the cold, hard ugly truth of the matter is, one girl is more at risk than the other to be chosen as the next victim. Rapists will indeed rape no matter what whenever they find the chance, but it’s on us, ladies, to make sure he has the least amount of chances possible to target us. Causation for increasing your risk is not justification for the crime! Is it fair that we must go out of our way to look out for creeps? NO! But that’s reality. We shouldn’t need to watch out for each other at parties, or a girls’ night out. We shouldn’t have to worry about trusting the guy to take us home safely. Or buy us that drink and worry if he drugged it. We should be able to dress as sexy as we want without any unwanted advances. However, what we should be able to do and what we are able to do without putting ourselves more at risk aren’t identical.

And yes, sometimes, rape will happen when we do everything right to lessen our chances. Rapists will rape, we get it… But isn’t that true for any crime? A burglar can still smash in your window even when you lock your door every night, but does that mean you shouldn’t bother to lock your doors? We talk about more emphasis on teaching boys not to rape and assault women, instead of teaching girls how to empower themselves and lessen their risks in the logic that the solution is solely on telling men not to rape.

However, look at it this way: We teach our children not to steal, yet there are still thieves. Should the solution for burglary be simply to teach people to not steal and call any attempt at advising people to lock their doors or hide their valuables victim blaming? After all, no one has the right to steal your stuff no matter where you leave it! Similarly, there are still rapists despite teaching boys not to rape. The crime is not going away in both cases sadly. So what are we to do? Just sit around on our hands and complain about the obvious injustice, or do something to protect ourselves from becoming a victim, even if it means making inconvenient and yes, unfair, lifestyle adjustments?

Ladies, we need to live in the world as it is, not live in the world that we want it to be. Even if that world demands a “sexist” or un-PC answer to lessening our risk. We ARE judged by how we dress, whether we like it or not. Wearing sexy, provocative clothing, while never justifying any unwanted advances, sends off the signal that you want a consensual interaction and if the wrong guy who’s a complete callous jerk feels you “led him on”, yes, some will cross that line into assault. It’s ugly and unfair, wildly unfair and unjust, but ladies, this is the reality we live in. It’s not about simple morality, or saying that the girl in the sexy dress is morally “lesser” or “bad” and deserves assault, but it is about the fact that as unfair as it is, you ARE judged by how you choose to present yourself, and a real rapist can use it as an excuse in his sick twisted mind to justify harming you.

Drinking until you’re black out drunk, going off alone with a strange guy at the party, taking a drink that could be roofied easily etc… increases your chances of victimization and puts you in a vulnerable position. No, alcohol doesn’t cause rape to happen, but it does increase your risk the rapist will target you because you can’t physically resist or even say “no”. Going off alone with no witnesses and no one to step in to protect you is the perfect way to be victimized. Is this fair? Is it fair that women need to be careful instead of just being carefree when out for the night? Of course not! But as said before, this is the cold hard reality of the world we live in.

Saying all this is bound to draw the ire of many screaming “victim blaming!”, but this is no more victim blaming than suggesting one lock their doors or hide valuables to lessen chances of a burglary. Rapes can happen even after every base is covered. But so can burglaries. So can any crime. NO set of precautions has a 100% guarantee or covers every situation. That however, doesn’t mean we don’t take those precautions. Yes, the rapist could be someone you know and trust. Yes it can happen elsewhere than parties. Yes, more subtle coercion could be involved. Yes, I know all those things! That however does not belittle the merits of precautions against rapes that do happen with strangers, or in parties for instance. You may not be able to avoid one scenario, but does that mean “Why bother learning how to avoid the other”? Sure, the burglar can just smash in my window, but he sure won’t come through my door if I can help it! 😉

Ladies, it’s also not black and white. I’m not saying you can never party, you can never go out, you can never wear that “cute little number” to the club on girls’ night, you can never have a drink or hang out with a guy. We don’t have to dress like nuns and never leave our homes! All I’m proposing is to be aware. Awareness is half the battle, and with a good dose of awareness and common sense, you can have that night out of fun and be as safe as you can. Empowerment is liberating, not constraining. The awareness to know what the risk factors are, and how to avoid them is liberating, as you can live your life, just be aware and vigilant. When we drive, we learn the rules of the road. When we choose where to live, we look into crime rates. We have fire drills. We have emergency drills. We look over our shoulder in that sketchy area. We hide our valuables. We do all these things AND live a normal life full of excitement and fun. Can we do everything we want, (drink to excess, dress like we’re turning tricks, go off with every guy in the bar etc… etc..)? No. But in moderation, and with awareness of the risks, we can weigh our chances and act accordingly.

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When it’s Not Just “A Matter of Opinion”…

I sincerely believe that many issues can be debated in a mindful and nuanced way, and that many topics are multidimensional and complex in that there truly is no one simple solution that can be solved by one side or the other 100%. I also argue that it’s wrong and misguided to demonize people over an opposing view, disregarding how they got to their opinion and what motivated them to feel as they do. The vast majority of issues are not all black and white, even ones people are strongly polarized over and strongly feel theirs is the only moral opinion. There are always mitigating circumstances, unique cases, exceptions to rules, gray areas to be seen etc… that make each issue very much a case by case basis. There is room for open mindedness and still staying strong in your own convictions. The two are not mutually exclusive! It is possible to hear the other side out, while sticking to your guns, so to speak. It is also not a weakness to change your opinion, or modify it in light of new information. I have done that over my journey too…

However, that said, I do also feel that certain issues are more ethically and morally salient than others, and therefore, must be more strongly debated. Yes, some issues cannot simply be written off as “Let’s agree to disagree”. Now, this doesn’t mean you have to make an arch enemy out of your friends, family, classmates, coworkers, etc… who hold the opposing view, but I’m talking on a societal level and a policy-making level. It is true one cannot easily “legislate morality”, but our laws reflect the moral code we embrace as a society. Not stealing. Not murdering. Not cheating people. Yes, I also realize there is a fine line between “public safety” and “nanny state”. We do need autonomy and individual choice in society as well. Society serves us, and while we must work together to keep it running smoothly, we’re not its slaves. However, without morality, there is social anarchy. As for the things we really can’t legislate per se, our de facto rules and attitudes in society can do just as much or even more harm than what is written into our laws and policies. After all, society really doesn’t change until we agree it should, no matter what any law says.

If you were to ask me about one area I’d advocate taking a more firm stance on in terms of fighting harder to get my way, I’d say it would be in matters of safety and risk of lasting harm. It’s one thing to argue the subtle nuances of fairness, what’s fair or not, and that’s important too. But there is more moral wiggle room. When policies and attitudes harm people, a clear line is drawn. We’ve all heard the phrase “Your rights end where another’s begins…” 🙂 When real harm is done, physically, and yes, emotionally in certain cases, or real danger is present, then yes, the debate just got more high stakes. So to me at least, while I can and will listen openly to other arguments for why something may not be so high stakes and such a big deal, I will speak out to stop policies and ideologies that are doing real and lasting harm. It’s not just “a matter of opinion” when:

Illegals and refugees are bringing in crime and 3rd world values of oppression and inequality and case after case of murder victims murdered by an illegal.

Biological men can go into a bathroom or locker room with women and girls under the guise of being transgender putting them at risk for sexual assaults.

Children aren’t safe in school from the thugs bused in from the rough neighborhoods to support some social agenda or when no one is safe in their once safe neighborhood due to policies bringing in thugs and a culture of crime.

A generation is raised in broken families, where live in boyfriend replaced dad, and mom resents the kids from her marriage with her ex. Where children are now primed for an increased chance of mental illness, depression, and risky behaviors.

Parents feel entitled to make decisions “consequence free” that will do deep and lasting harm to their children emotionally, scarring them for life for the sake of an adult’s convenience or happiness, over a child’s need for stability and love.

A society where young women are told that they need to be promiscuous to be empowered, risking STD’s, sexual assault, and a damaged self-image/esteem leading to vulnerability and abuse.

The attitude of it’s “blaming the victim” to tell young women how to empower themselves to decrease their risk for assault creates a false sense of security and opens them up to fall right into the predator’s trap.

The men in our lives can be accused and have their lives destroyed on a whim by #MeToo witch hunts with no other evidence than a Y chromosome and a stereotype.

Our country is defended by a weaker less able military in the name of “gender equality”.

A human life is considered an inconvenience easily disposed of and honoring its human rights is a “choice”.

Anti-Gun policies enable the mass shooter bent on destruction of human life to come in to your child’s school and shoot without hindrance or the shooter at the movie theater, or the mall, at work, or anywhere you go since no one is armed but him!

Terrorism reins free here and abroad, creating a world of distrust, suspicion, and obviously, lost lives and property. A world where going for a vacation is your last choice on this Earth, going to work and never coming home, going on a trip to see a beautiful attraction in a country just like our own is now too dangerous, a car veering off the road is more than just an accident, an unknown package requires the bomb squad, etc… etc…

A country that turns a blind eye to crime rates by demographic, calls for abolishing border protection, schools that cover up instances of sexual assault due to transgender policies from the parents of the victims, news reports that don’t give the description of a wanted suspect due to race or other minority status etc… etc…

Science and academia is suppressed from publishing research studies that conflict with the party line that would help people suffering and provide better solutions to many social issues.

A country where starving citizens, homeless veterans, needy children and families, hardworking people who just need that extra leg up, are brushed aside for outsiders or fellow citizens able to support themselves coming to take our resources for themselves without giving back. The detrimental effects are real: Homelessness, hunger, poor health, etc…

The media reports false information to support an agenda that takes our focus off the real dangers to look out for and be aware of.

And so many others. These are all tangible dangers that affect our society greatly, due to societal attitudes and policies. Our policies enable these injustices to go on and endanger ourselves, our family, our friends and our fellow citizens. So do our de facto attitudes that pressure people to turn a blind eye and just shut up. Well, someone has to speak up, and it needs to be all of us together. Someone to advocate for our families, our communities, our country. Someone to say, NO, it’s NOT up for debate when people’s lives are literally on the line. Someone to say that a person’s right to safety and freedom from harm matters more than any agenda or social experiment. Someone who is brave enough to say:

The safety of our families, communities, and country is NOT “a matter of opinion”!!!

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A PSA to The Left: You Don’t Have to Like Trump, Just Don’t Go Nuts…

Dear Liberals,

It’s me again… Another conservative out of many in this country. I’ve seen the way you’ve handled losing the 2016 election: With uncontrollable outrage and vitriol that hasn’t died down since the second you found out he got in. I’m impressed, honestly! I thought your tantrum would be old news and you would have simmered down within a month or so, but no! Two years and counting and coming up on the next election and all I can hear is “Racist!”, “Sexist!”, “Fascist!” etc… and of course, your favorite new slogan, “Impeach!!!” 

Now you say Trump deserves it, Trump is special, he’s done so much harm… And in light of any substantial evidence, I too want my president and other authority figures held accountable for their actions. However, I fail to see any substantial evidence he has done something gravely wrong enough to impeach him for! Some locker room talk? You better shun every male friend and relative if you hold to the idea that no decent man ever bantered some off color comments with the boys in private! His ex wives and personal flings? Oh, yeah, because Trump is the first politician or rich celebrity to ever think of not being the perfect little angel! Shall we bring up the laundry list of politicians on the Left who have done wrong in their personal lives? Bill anyone? 😉 More importantly, how does that affect him carrying out his duties at President of The United States? We can argue Trump and other politicians too aren’t the greatest family men. Not 100% moral blemish free. Yes, some things can make me lose some measure of respect for people in their personal lives over flings and affairs. However, what really matters to me, what will affect me and the rest of the country is if the person in office honors his role in office and carries out all their duties they swore to do.

I know some of the more intricate political controversies over Trump have been extensively covered, and thus won’t go in to too much depth over what would require its own separate post! However, I will say that in light of the recent news about Muller’s report being released, the whole Russian collusion allegation concluded predictably 😉 Not much to see here, folks! In addition, countless other allegations have been brought up, then when proven false, silently gone out in the news cycle by Left leaning media, to be replaced with others, in what appears to be an attempt at grasping at straws.

If you were to ask me personally, and probably other conservatives too why they voted Trump, reasons given would be one, he’s making real change for the better. Our country was not in good shape, a bad economy, cheated in foreign policies, terrorism running rampant among others. The way we’ve been going under the past 8 years before hasn’t been working out… Nothing was being changed. We needed a new strategy, new ideas, and Trump had them. Knowing business from his past career, he knows how to negotiate, how to compromise, and also when to hold firm, like in his recent summit with North Korea. He knows the economy, and has improve it greatly. My family, as a few are self employed or commissioned, have not seen as much job opportunities in years until Trump got in. Just recently, he pushed back ISIS and about wiped them out. He made better deals with other nations to ensure we be treated fairly. He’s standing up for our national security and protecting our borders and our resources. He’s given people a second chance even as part of the so called “tough on crime” party… Is Trump the most diplomatic? Not really… I will admit many of his tweets can be quite frank and pointed! But sometimes, the smooth talker isn’t always the best leader despite that polished appearance. Sometimes, you need to call a spade a spade even if it’s not flattering and hard to hear. I challenge you to find one conservative who’s not “alt-right” in some fringe extremist group, to say they voted Trump because they want to subjugate women and set back race relations 100 years… As for the assertions Trump is sexist or racist, I only ask, have you known him for being such things before he ran for office?

However, all this said, wait for it…. You have the right not to like Trump. Yes, I am accepting of others forming their own opinions on Trump or any other candidate. I don’t feel like people must be required to drool over Trump’s feet more than any other politician. Trump should be open to fair criticism and intense scrutiny as any other president should be. Not all of Trump’s ideas will fall through to the fullest extent. He can’t do it all more than any other man. But then again, name one president who fulfilled 100% of his campaign promises! If you feel Trump isn’t up to your standards, fine. Fine by me. The entire country doesn’t have to like whatever current president is in office or else there wouldn’t be a need to vote! 😉 If you feel the evidence is not sufficient enough to vote Trump in 2020, that’s your right in a democracy.

Here’s my problem though: Going absolutely insane over not liking Trump! See, not voting for Trump and threatening those who do are in two radically different ball parks! Saying Trump should be treated like a man, not a demi-god above the law is fair. What isn’t fair is spewing vitriolic allegations without actual proof, and doctoring “evidence” to suit your conclusions! Calling a man a “rapist”, a “racist”, a “fascist” demands heavy proof as those are very ugly accusations not to take lightly. Investigating voting fraud and cheating such as collusion with foreign powers if suspected is one thing, but keeping up the charade for two years going no where with any proof to actually impeach reflects far more on you than him. Coming up with wild conspiracy theories and failing to accept that maybe, just maybe, it was possible the nation voted him in like any other president in US history… Why is it so hard to just accept you didn’t get your way for once? How is he so radically different from any other past president you didn’t vote for? Other conservative presidents?

Know what I think? Your insane vitriol over Trump has actually drove me to like him more and has convinced me to vote him in in 2020. Believe it or not, in 2016 I wasn’t sure of Trump either. I voted for a 3rd party. I had reservations about his ability to lead this country and saw him more as the superficial celebrity. However, seeing what he accomplished in office proved himself to me. See? I can change my mind based on actual evidence! The other major factor too as mentioned, was seeing the absolute meltdown over him where he and anyone who did vote for him were branded “deplorable” and immoral people… Threats, violence, ostracism, etc…etc… all from the Left to try to drive us into silence over our current president has only further convinced me not to vote for your party! Before politics became a bigger part of my identity overall, if people reacted with such vitriol towards Obama, there is a good chance I might have voted for him in 2012! Not because I was a huge Obama fan at all, (I’m certainly not now!) but because any party who would react with such insanity and utter immaturity is not one I respect nor would take seriously to run my country. What pushed me away from the Left, other than strictly policy-wise, is indeed this outlandish behavior and lack of decorum!

By all means don’t vote for Trump if you feel he’s not up for the job. Just don’t go into a paroxysm of late stage TDS and foam at the mouth at the mere mention of Trump. Criticize Trump just like any other politician, but be big enough to admit when he does something right. Hold Trump accountable for his actions, but also defend him when he is being unfairly accused. Realize he will make mistakes, he won’t be able to fulfill all his campaign promises, but also realize that no other president was mistake free or achieved 100% of his goals. Donald Trump is human too, and he deserves to be allowed an honest mistake or an un-reached goal like any other president and human being. I’d love to talk more in detail over why the Left believes as it does about Trump, but thus far, I cant find any who are willing to talk in a clear headed rational manner without throwing ad-hominems at Trump supporters like me, or Trump…

So in summary, you don’t have to like Trump to make me listen to you. You don’t have to be in love with how he handles his presidency. I wasn’t with Obama the past 8 years he was in office. However, I never spewed vitriol, threatened, harassed and ostracized those who did like Obama. Nor did I believe every unsubstantiated conspiracy theory people brought up, blinded by my hatred. I can admit it if Obama did anything good for the country as well as see his flaws. I never screamed “Impeach!!!” just because I didn’t get my way for a few years. Put it in perspective: Trump is not dictator for life! You will get your way eventually, and we will again too. That’s just how a fair democracy works. No one gets their way all the time! I learned that in preschool. So Dear Liberals, you didn’t lose my vote or my respect because you don’t like Trump. You lost it when you lost your decorum, civility and outright moral conduct over not getting your way…

(PS. I know my tone is harsh in this letter, but consider how harsh you sound if you imagine all you say about us and Trump, only replacing us with you, and Trump with your candidate! I also note that if you want to be addressed in a more gentle manner, please extend the courtesy to us also in the future 😉 …)

— A Lady of Reason

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How The Left is Driving A Wedge…

The Left’s derisive rhetoric and ideology has driven a wedge in much of society. From race wars, to gender wars. Gay versus straight, cis versus transgender. Black versus white. Christian versus Non-Christian. Etc…etc… Seeing the worst of intentions in innocuous comments. “Microaggressions” so microscopic yet so massive to the “victim”. Scapegoating, blaming, finger pointing, you name it! The Left fosters it. And what does all this un-nuanced black and white division do to society? You guessed it! Divided society at every level and among every group! Families are literally feuding over how one voted in 2016. Ostracism, insults, ultimatums are becoming more and more prominent in friendships, relationships, and families all over politics and social issues. An opposing opinion is no longer grounds for “disagreeing to disagree” then changing the subject. No! now it has to mean the other person is evil, bigoted, immoral, and even perverted in some cases!

Take this scenario, based off this article. A mom whose daughters are 13 and 15 wrote in to a columnist that she is upset that her husband and her father in law are telling jokes that all dads with daughters know about, such as “Dad better buy a shotgun for when they start dating!” Or “lock your doors!”. She claims it made her daughters uncomfortable as well as herself. The columnist wrote back in agreement saying that such jokes rob daughters of their agency, and make light of gun violence. Now, I agree with one thing: If the daughters don’t like it, they should stop out of respect for their daughters’ and granddaughters’ wishes.

However, lets dive deeper into what I argue this portrayal of this common family scenario has been seen through a lens of extreme projection and misguided conclusions. Jokes like those told by men one, are NOT taken literally (just like 99.9% of jokes!) and really meant to reflect a man’s sense of duty and honor towards his daughters, and more widely, protecting the women in his life. Quite frankly, a woman such as a mother, does not have the full sense of the dynamic between man-to-man interactions and how men express sentiments is not the same often as how a woman might express it. The “protect your daughters” jokes are an example of that. Grandpa was simply giving dad a man-to-man pat on the back so to speak, for the challenges of raising daughters and making sure their best interests are respected by any suitor.

The jokes are hyperbolic: Barring out and out abuse, a sane and reasonable man would not literally pull out a gun and terrorize a suitor! The point is that the jokes are meant to show how far a man would go to protect his daughter from mistreatment, exploitation, coercion or abuse if it were to occur, not that hell go out like a man man waving a gun at every teenage boy in town! While of course, mothers also are deeply invested in protecting their daughters from predatory or toxic men, the special role of an honorable man has always been to guard his daughters until he knows her chosen one is worthy of her, beyond what a woman is expected to do.

Grandpa, who’s “guilty” of said jokes, is not being a perv, or a chauvinist who believes that his granddaughters should literally be locked up like in some 3rd world culture, but a man who in his wisdom, is supporting the dad in his role as protector. As to the other argument about agency and autonomy, one, what other areas of major life choices would you argue a young teenager should have complete and total autonomy over? And two, why not complain more about cultures who literally KILL their daughters over an unapproved suitor and force her into marriage at the age these girls are? Where’s the feminist outrage over that??? You can argue all you want you don’t want men to occupy that traditional role guarding his daughter’s hearts, but what would you say of a man who’s just like, “Whatever… What do I care about my daughter’s dating habits…” As for the daughters themselves, perhaps they were conditioned from day one to look at men as potential perverts and misogynists and were primed to read disgusting undertones in grandpa’s well meaning comments.  Just look at the Girl Scouts of America telling parents young girls hugging grandpa leads to sexual coercion at work 20 years later! Just because mom, not socialized to have the honor code of a man, doesn’t quite understand the subtle nuances of the dynamic between Dad and Grandpa, doesn’t mean they have nefarious intentions or sexist attitudes! My case rests… 😉

The next scenario, related to family matters, is the case of a mother on an online forum freaking out over her 7 year old daughter’s kitten heels she bought for some special event, like a daddy daughter dance, let’s say. I’ve also covered this topic before too, but what shocked me was the mothers reaction to what Dad said: She said she was fearful and troubled because Dad said, guess what? “Wow! You look so grown up!” to his daughter when he saw her in those shoes. Mom believes that Dad’s comment was perverted in the worst possible way, and that yes, implied it meant Dad was lusting over his little girl comparing her to a grown woman! Even more shockingly, multiple women agreed with her!

Now, to a sane person, it sounds just like a dad amazed, as any parent is, of how fast is child is growing up. Seeing his daughter, in her fancy dress, her hair done up, some light makeup, and in those cute little shoes for her special dance with daddy, it is not out of the question that as a parent, he could see in her in that moment, some of the woman she will grow into very soon. A beautiful woman he will one day dance with again at her wedding. Or send off to her prom. What only the sickest most vile pervert would see in a little girl in kitten heels is a sex object to lust over!!! In the fight to stop oversexualizing girls, the  women’s rights movement has ironically, sexualized them to the extreme by seeing everything that was once innocent, as now sexual, sick and perverted! I can only think of two scenarios. Number one, mom is wildly and wrongly projecting the most vile thoughts on her husband for being a sentimental dad, or she married a complete monster and doesn’t deserve to raise a child if she allows him to be near her daughter. I strongly suspect the former case is more probable…

Lastly but certainly not least of all, another example of how a family can be utterly divided by Leftist ideology is the common case of that relative who says something un-PC at the family gathering. Now, instead of just chalking it up to an older generation who were raised with different norms, or an innocuous comment that just came off as “insensitive” as opposed to a targeted insult, many Left learning parents are struggling with whether or not to let the kids see Grandma, or Aunt Sally, or Uncle Joe over “sexist” or “racist” sentiments that most reasonable people outside of the radical Left wouldn’t interpret as openly racist or sexist for instance. apparently, it’s not enough to say to your kids, “I disagree with what Grandma says sometimes, and here’s why, but we still love her even though we differ on certain subjects…”

Now, it’s all or nothing. If Grandma’s not “woke” enough, she doesn’t make the cut! Or maybe just be open and honest and tell Grandma, or Uncle Joe or Aunt Susie not to bring those topics up in front of your kids when they come to visit. Many, even if they differ from your perspective will honor your request. After all, 5 year olds care more about Grandma’s cookies than Grandma’s political ideologies! 😉 However, why can’t we just be brave enough to expose our kids to differing views then let them know they can make up their own mind in their own time without pressure from either side? We can’t grow as people without thinking deeply and thinking for oneself after all.

In all three examples, we see families utterly divided by the Left. Granddaughters that see grandpa and their own father as sexist creeps for wanting to protect them. A wife who sees her husband and father in law as misogynistic and not having their children’s and grandchildren’s best interests at heart. A mother who implicitly views her own husband as a sick pedophile lusting over his daughter on the grounds of saying as every parent says, “You look so grown up!”. Parents across the nation alienating their kids from their grandparents, aunts and uncles over politics, ideas the children don’t even know about or care about yet. Teaching the kids that an opposing opinion is immoral, and the person holding it is bad and to be written off without hearing why they have that “offending” opinion. If that isn’t division, then what is??? I have liberals and conservatives in my family, and among my friends. If I alienated everyone who doesn’t think exactly like me, I’d be one lonely person! 😉

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Speaking of Microaggressions…

In my previous post, I talked about how the Left just loves to see maleficent intent in innocent mistakes and misunderstandings. How they see bigotry where only curiosity lies, or prejudice where there is merely ignorance and mistaken assumptions. How what was once formerly innocuous, or something that no one else would think to see or use in an offensive hurtful manner is now assumed to be a targeted attack. Nowadays, one cannot say nearly anything in fear of offending someone!

Also typical of the Left, however, is their ability to set the most hypocritical of double standards! While they claim legitimacy over the idea of a microaggression being harmful and far from trivial, they I argue now, create their own microaggressions against anyone they don’t like as well! See, two can play at the “microaggression” game 😉 The definition of a microaggression according to Psychology Today:

Microaggressions are the everyday verbal, nonverbal, and environmental slights, snubs, or insults, whether intentional or unintentional, which communicate hostile, derogatory, or negative messages to target persons based solely upon their marginalized group membership.

And guess what? I can list multiple examples from my own experiences, my family’s and also what is heard in the increasingly Leftist society that would fall under that definition in being hurtful, stereotyping, discriminatory, and marginalizing of conservatives and other quote “majority” identities that are said without anyone batting an eye! (And yes, all examples I cite were either personally witnessed, told to me by family and friends or seen in the media…) Now you tell me whether or not if the races and genders in my examples were reversed, they would be acceptable:

A professor in class apologizes to the class for all the white male scientists that existed throughout history versus more scientists of color and women… (To put this in perspective, imagine if it was an apology for all the Jewish scientists that existed!)

A close family member being told that he’s a man from quote, “that generation” (A.k.a, a baby boomer) in a contemptuous way and that he watched “too many John Wayne movies” to dismiss his opinions as an educator on protecting schools from shootings by arming security and teachers…

Numerous Lefties on social media assuming that I’m some Bible thumping fundie solely because I’m a conservative then trying to play the Jesus card on me, or their utter derision of anyone who is conservative out of genuine faith…

Similarly, Lefties assuming I must be anti-science because I’m a conservative who sees many Liberal agendas pushed as science, and their belief that Republicans are impervious to empirical data…

A professor tells the class that most people voted for Trump because they’re racist then spends the next 15 minutes, of every class period (in a class entirely unrelated to politics) berating Trump and his supporters…

A family friend who grew up in a broken home in poverty and worked hard to put all of his children through college and raise them in a middle class home with a stable family, only to be thanked by being told he’s unduly “privileged” due to nothing but his skin color by his own children…

A professor tells the class that white Republican men are the most dangerous terrorist group in the country…

Another family member of mine berating me over creating this blog and strongly implying that my opinions make me an inherently immoral person…

The numerous SNL and other skits played for laughs  such as this one, that don’t simply lampoon Trump as a political figure as any other has been throughout history, but make targeted personal attacks on the morality and character of everyone who decided to vote for him accusing them of the vilest forms of hatred…

Being told that being proud of your heritage and culture means you’re a white supremacist and bigoted against other cultures…

A male student in a class being told by the professor, that he is “part of the problem” and that he “threw all his female classmates under the bus” for standing up for due process for men who are accused, and challenging radical feminism…

A student in a US history class ranting about how the South has “always hindered progress” and promotes oppression and never embraces more egalitarian values to this day while several students in the class were known to be from Southern states…

Every “safe space” created to get away from white people, men, and conservatives and every literal white, male, conservative free zone…

A white professor asking a student of color, who is a first generation immigrant proud to have the opportunities this country offered, “What challenges living in America do you experience?” in a pointed and leading way (without asking about any benefits also) to in essence, ask “So, how have you been oppressed being a person of color in America?” Then have the student fumble around looking for a decent answer…

Now, on principle I reject the notion that microaggressions are something to be taken seriously, and believe treating them as such only leads to derisiveness and fragility. However, it is worth pointing out all the “little” slights and insults that marginalize us too are hurled by the Left in the most hypocritical fashion, as they decry exactly what they are doing to us, when applied to their own protected groups! So I spelled out some examples out of the many hundreds that are actually meant to sting and alienate that many don’t bat an eye at when hurled our way. Two can play at the Let Me Cry Microagression!© game after all 😉

So fellow patriots, did you have an experience of a “microaggression” similar to the ones I listed or a different one you want to share that happened to you? Please leave a comment! 🙂

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A PSA to The PC Crowd: Ignorance is Not Malevolence!

This observation came up for a while now in noting the various absurdities of the pro-political correctness crowd that in many cases, they seem to judge everything in a “one size fits all” sort of way. This is probably no surprise to many of my fellow conservatives, but I do want to expand on this particular aspect of it. Imagine a few scenarios if you will which I will proceed to describe:

A few students are gathered in the cafeteria for dinner at some college somewhere, and meet up with a few friends and acquaintances. Some of these friends also brought over their friend groups unknown to your group. To break the ice, one white student asks a student of color “Uh, so, where are you from?” The student of color answers “Oh, I’m from Upstate NY…”. The white student then prods further, “But, where are you from originally? Where are you really from?”

A guy goes out to a party on a Friday night with his buddies. They see a group of what looks to be girls wanting to look for a date to dance with and hang out with. One guy is nervous, and really doesn’t know what to say to start the conversation and absentmindedly blurts out “Hey, you’d look nice if you smile” to one girl staring off more absentmindedly. She gets angry and retorts “It’s not my job to smile for you!”

In a discussion about race, a participant says “I don’t see color, I treat everyone equally…” when asked how they would view a solution to stopping racism and racial bias.

A co-worker recently has come out that they are transitioning to be transgender. They tell everyone what pronoun to use and the new name they want to be called, but many at the office find it hard to remember either, and out of habit, refer to and accidentally address the person by their old name/pronouns. 

A white person called up on stage during a concert (This is based off a real event) to sing a rap song written and sung by a black performer included the “N”-word as it was in the lyrics of the song.

At the neighborhood picnic, a neighbor reveals he has Native American ancestry and someone asks “So, how Indian are you?”. 

All of the above examples are considered offensive and demeaning within the politically correct edicts. Reasons given for each scenario are asking where someone is from “others” that person and makes them feel like you don’t think they’re a legitimate American and like an exotic other. Asking a girl to smile is now considered sexist and a form of harassment, a sexist entitlement to make a woman conform to your needs vs. her own autonomy. The idea of being “colorblind”, the Left says, does not help not being racist, and in fact, now is racist as they believe it marginalizes the influence race plays in inequality. Not using the correct names and pronouns for a transgendered person de-legitimizes their choice to be transgender and live as their preferred gender. Non-black people are not allowed to use racial slurs, but black people are exempt as they are said to be “reclaiming” the slurs once used to oppress them. And in the last but certainly not the last example of what constitutes a PC faux pas, asking “How Indian are you?” is said to be ignorant and offensive as it implies they’re not a “real” Native American.

On the surface, these seem to be at least semi-believable explanations. They have been said over and over to the latest generation, including myself many times throughout school, media and society. However, looking deeper into each reveals the issues may not be so black and white in of themselves, but also the key factor: The intentions of the people who made such an “Un-PC” mistake.

Saying “Where are you from?” because someone looks a little different is not always, and in fact is most likely not a pointed slight to make someone feel like an outsider. The question in any other context is simply used as an ice breaker to start a conversation and get to know a person more. It’s really context dependent and also in your tone of voice. Saying it in a suspicious and accusatory way does indeed hint to a less friendly intention, however a neutral question said in curiosity is most likely meant that way. In the scenario, however, it is pushed further when the answer wasn’t what the person was going for. Even then, I argue, it doesn’t have to be a display of bigotry. Is it always prejudice if the person genuinely had curiosity as to what part of the world someone’s heritage came from, especially if they do look different than most others around? Yes, in that case the person being asked is sort of “the other”, but the point in asking what part of the world they are from ethnically is to make them less of an outsider, and to become more familiar with them. Racism and prejudice can stem from ignorance, but the key to combating ignorance is asking questions to gain knowledge! Most who ask such questions, while can appear insensitive, are merely just curious, not prejudicial and suspicious. Curiosity is NOT bigotry!

Asking a girl to smile I will say, is probably awkward in most cases depending how you phrase it and  if you’re talking to a stranger. However, labeling it as depriving women of their bodily autonomy and being male entitlement is going way off the deep end! Think of it: A young guy who is shy and awkward around girls might blurt out something that’s a bit awkward and not quite the ideal pick up line, but is that an expression of oppressing women? I’d argue the last thing any nervous guy approaching a girl to ask her out feels is “entitled”! Asking a girl to smile is nowhere near REAL harassment of women…

Saying “I don’t see color” while not the catch all solution to end all forms of racism and bias, had its heart in the right place. While not solving racism, it fosters the attitude to help combat it as it is said in the spirit of treating every person as equal in human worth and dignity, regardless of skin color. The idea skin color isn’t even a factor in how we should treat others. The world would indeed be a much kinder place if we didn’t obsess over each other’s phenotypes…

I have other reasons to sympathize with those who don’t want to legitimize just “choosing” to be another gender and calling it reality, but in the common scenario that the pronoun and name conflict comes up, the issue of common habit, not a pointed rejection is a valid explanation. See, if you knew “Bob” your coworker as Bob and referred to him as a “he/him” for the 20 years you worked at the company, it may be a harder transition to consistently remember to call him “Susie” and “she/her” overnight! Even if you’re perfectly okay with his/her choice, just the sheer habit of knowing him by one name and identity takes a lot of getting used to, and slip ups happen… If the pronouns are different such as the made up gender neutral ones, it’s like learning a new language!

If you get invited to sing a song at a concert, that contains a swear word, and you say said taboo word, is it your fault as if you chose to say it spontaneously? If it’s not your own word, you’re just quoting someone else’s choice to use it, and if it’s in the song the artist invites you to sing, then why omit it? The person in that scenario that said the racial slur was NOT saying it to disparage anyone, nor was her own choice of words, but the lyrics to a popular rap sing she was INVITED to sing! Racism never even entered the picture other than she was white and singing along to a song written by a black artist. In this case, context means everything…

And in my last example, it’s related to the first one: Curiosity. No one is prodding to do detective work into if someone is a “real” Indian, or anyone else (Unless you’re running for political office capitalizing on that status 😉 )! People can be genuinely and innocently curious about things, and it means no more than that. Asking how Indian someone is is simply about curiosity, and many wouldn’t even think it would be offensive to ask any more than asking how much German or Italian ancestry someone had. Does anyone of mixed ethnic European ancestry feel invalidated and feel less German or less French or English for instance if someone asks how much ancestry they have of those respective countries?

And tying all these various examples of some “microaggressions” as the Left calls them together, the common theme is the “perpetrators” are either merely curious, or ignorant that it is coming off as offensive or insensitive. No one in all scenarios presented had deliberate intent to oppress, marginalize, invalidate and belittle anyone! Yes, pointed and snide comments can happen, and are meant to be offensive, and I advocate for everyone to stand their ground if insulted so. However, before making that comeback to shut them up, think first on the intention of that off color remark or seemingly insensitive comment or question. Did they mean to hurt or belittle you, or were they simply curious or ignorant of how it came off to your ears? Most, if told they offended would feel mortified and apologize right away! Let me emphasize this again: Curiosity is not bigotry. Ignorance is not prejudice. The vast majority of microaggressions are merely mistakes and misunderstandings, not targeted insults. The elder who uses that outdated word is just saying what was acceptable in their generation without malice. The kids dressed up as Indians aren’t thinking “Hey, isn’t it fun to marginalize Native Americans?” The nervous guy just blurted something awkward out and is embarrassed, not entitled! Ignorantly assuming something off a common stereotype betrays lack of knowledge and familiarity, not lack of acceptance and kindness.

Yes, I also realize damage can be done even with good intentions. However, intentions do matter. Breaking the prized vase does damage regardless if you pushed it on purpose or by being knowingly reckless, or simply bumped into it and it fell. However, one is judged to be an accident, and one a deliberate act or one you are culpable for neglecting to be careful of such an event. How is that done? By the intention of the person who did it! Why isn’t it the same for all these PC grievances too? A person may feel “othered” by a comment or question regardless of original intent, but in terms of judging the one who said it, one should consider did they mean any harm and did they know it would offend? Unfortunately, the politically correct crowd only sees everything as a one size fits all issue of perpetual offense and demonizing those who unwittingly commit the dreaded microaggression… Well, all I have to say to them is just wait until it’s YOU on the other end of the accusation… How will YOU want to be judged? 😉

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