What Makes a Strong Woman?

In this day and age, the cultural Zeitgeist is all about “women’s empowerment” and raising “strong women”. We think we know what these ideas should mean and have a mental picture of what they look like, but what really does a strong woman look like? Many cite qualities like independence, autonomy, assertiveness, leadership, etc… Many see her in some sort of high position of power, or with fancy degrees in some high-status career like doctor, lawyer, politician, some STEM field. It’s common to think of her being able to do “anything a man can do” with slogans like “girl power” and “girls rule the world”…

However the question is raised, is that what really makes a woman “strong”? How exactly does one define “strong”? Is it in her assertiveness almost to the point of aggressiveness? Her job title or her credentials? Her assertions that she doesn’t need a man for anything? Her ability to throw off traditional gender norms and clamor for all things masculine? The irony that many qualities she strives for in herself she would now label “toxic” in a man? The fact that she has liberal “woke” politics and ideologies unlike the “gender traitors” who are conservative women? They say a strong woman can think for herself, yet labeled those who stood by Kavanaugh or Trump as “gender traitors”. Is that what strong women are expected to do? Feel threatened enough by others whose opinions you don’t like that you have to shut them up?

Thing is, while many qualities above in moderation such as independence, assertiveness or leadership are okay, I argue our current concept of what makes a woman “strong” really betrays a type of weakness and vulnerability as well as implicitly sexist. The most problematic aspect of how we think of a strong woman is rooted in the implicit idea that she must be like a man, and throw off her traditional gender roles as a woman because male=empowerment and female=oppression. To truly be “equal” in this frame of mind is to be able to be and do anything a man does, but no mention of anything uniquely “woman” in her fight for equality. Whatever a man can do is better than what women traditionally have done. She must want a career, because her “dreams” must go beyond “mere” house keeping and child raising. She needs to earn her own way, or else she’s too “dependent” on a man thus virtually enslaved! Being a wife and mother apparently is not enough to foster her “personal development”. She must literally wear the pants, because dressing as a woman is the “uniform of oppression”. She is “empowered” when she can silence any man who dares speak his mind on issues pertaining to her, cry victim anytime she wants, be pushy and rude and call it “assertiveness”, shun a more feminine identity and reduce it to a “stereotype” and declare that the world is stacked against her. Now, many women who consider themselves as strong don’t feel they support this idea of it, however their attitudes implicitly support many of these ideas.

When you tell a girl “But what else do you want to do? You’re still young…” When she says she wants to raise a family when she grows up.

When you say “You can’t comment on this issue because you’re not a woman!”

When you tell your daughters “Never depend on a man for anything.”

When you say to fight “stereotypes” of women such as being married, home making, and wearing dresses.

You are perpetuating a distorted view of what it means to be strong. To me honestly, such ideas about strength betray weakness and vulnerability. The idea that being a traditional woman is a sign of oppression and that to have any worth in society, or to be considered independent is to take on traditional masculine characteristics belittles womanhood as a whole. Also reinforcing the sexist and misogynist idea that women are second class or lesser members of society, and must imitate men to bear a semblance to anything worthy of being called empowered, equal and strong.

What does it really say about society when the clamor for prominence and power in the public eye are valued far greater than the upbringing of our future generations? Just because a role is not as visible, doesn’t mean the job is any less needed. Motherhood, while more behind the scenes, IS a job in itself. A 24/7 job for life. Standing by your man does not mean you don’t have your own identity. Pants don’t equal freedom from some oppressed role and skirts and dresses don’t mean you’re second class. Wife and mother are just as important titles as CEO or PhD. Power and prestige are not all there is in life. Equal does not always mean identical; men and women can have separate gender roles and be equal in dignity and worth to each other. Putting men’s roles on a pedestal for women to be able to climb to inherently devalues traditional women’s roles even if cried for in the name of equality. Guarding one’s sexuality is not a form of coercion by the patriarchy when women have so much more to lose if she slips up. A woman’s purity is to be honored, not mocked and derided as “old fashioned”. A strong woman and a traditional woman exist side by side and are in no way mutually exclusive! 

So what does it mean to be a strong woman? A strong woman is many things in my opinion:

The confidence in her identity as a traditional women as valuable and meaningful in of itself without the need to be like a man to be worth something.

The ability to value her husband and children over any job title or credential she might earn.

Seeing her privilege, not her victimhood.

A self identity that is strong enough to not feel threatened by taking her husband’s name upon marriage, being “given away” at the altar, being called “Mrs.” or the idea of marriage.

Feeling as empowered and capable in a dress or skirt with long hair as in pants and short hair.

The strength to know she can depend on others like a father, brother, husband etc… for her care and safety and still be independent and strong in her own right.

Taking pride in the fact that she has the choice to give life, not in the choice to take it.

Who can handle words like “mankind” and “man” in the general sense without feeling excluded and microaggressed.

The fortitude to hold the family together in times of trouble, but also let a man take the lead and be the rock when she is given the chance.

Being a rock in her own unique way, as a moral compass of virtue, elegance, and grace for all to see in her family and in the world.

Dressing modestly as a sign of her inner worth and dignity, and having no need to flaunt her body for all to see for her to be “liberated”.

Who is strong enough to think for herself and not feel threatened by another’s opinion nor the need to force other women to think as she does.

Recognizing her ability to achieve her goals not in spite of being a woman in an “oppressive” society, but because of her determination, work ethic, and perseverance as a person. 

The strength it takes to be uniquely feminine, in her own right.

To me those are some things that make a strong woman 🙂

Strong woman

(I made this graphic myself!)

Classism: The Left’s Less Talked About Hypocrisy…

The Left often purports to be the party of egalitarianism… Anti-racist, anti sexist, the party of “tolerance” etc… etc… and yet, they have been proven time and time again to show they themselves display some of the most blatantly racist, sexist and intolerant ways of thought and action to groups they deem “less than”. However a less talked about aspect of this lies in another domain: prejudice and stereotyping based on socioeconomic status, in other words, classism.

You probably hear the Left saying how they want to dismantle social and economic inequality such as lessening the poverty gap and stopping rich elites from getting their privileges at the expense of everyone else. They may even talk about doing away with capitalism which to them, is the “enemy”! They say they are for the common man and woman, and yet, their true actions like much of what they do show through the facade of their utopic plans…

I would argue that on many counts, they are actually quite classist and demean the common man and woman and especially blue collar families. They say they want all these benefits to blue collar workers such as higher wages, more worker’s rights, more opportunities to advance, and yet, characterize them as these stupid ignoramuses! The Leftist politicians who come from wealth and privilege talk about how billionaires shouldn’t exist while raking in millions of dollars and living a lifestyle of gated communities, private jets, designer clothes, etc… and saying how they came from humble roots when in fact, they have always known privileges the common man and woman have not. Apparently this blatant hypocrisy is supposed to have gone over our heads and lead us to believe they were just like us! They treat us like low information voters, “sheeple” if you will, who will vote however they ideologically herd us.

Not to mention, they only care about the poor and blue collar they pick and choose, like the cradle to grave welfare leech who won’t work and lives off what others work to earn all their lives, or the illegal coming into the country to get those illicit votes. The Left “cares” about them, yet tells the blue collar worker earning his own wage he’s a “racist” for daring to ask why he has to earn his living and support his family when others who can work are supported through his salary. Regular blue collar folks, especially white families who are working poor or blue collar, and even middle class in some cases are seen as invisible to the supposed “benefits” the Left wants to hand out.

However the greatest example of the Left’s classist attitudes comes out when stereotyping who a conservative is. The stereotype of the average conservative in the Left’s mind is a white blue collar or middle class family. The people in what they call “Middle America” especially. Basically characterized as ignorant, backwards, uneducated hicks! Blind to their “white privilege” despite the fact they’re struggling to make ends meet, pay their bills, support their families, send their kids to college for a leg up in life etc… and dare to then question why these families are bitter over the cradle to grave welfare recipients and illegals who are getting free or subsidized healthcare, college, food, and such while they must earn everything they ever have.

There is also the incredibly insulting classist stereotype as well that these “deplorables” as Hillary called them, that can only be explained as the poorer and blue collar people having this mindset of anti-intellectualism or not wanting to better themselves socially and economically. This idea that while these families may come off as “upright” and have wholesome family values, that is rich in morals but little else, they have settled into their lot in life as lower wage workers without thinking of advancing themselves up the social ladder. While being seen as having wholesome values is a positive thing in itself, like the black people as athletic stereotype, it implies negatively that they are not smart or educated so while not directly negative, has a negative insinuation inherent in the stereotype. Using the language from a class I took once, the Left stereotypes the common man and woman as high in warmth but low in competence. Whereas I think why not see them as both? Related to the “wholesome values” stereotype, an extra-negative spin on this is that their values are actually very narrow minded and excludes others whereas the Left of course, has more tolerant and “inclusive” value systems. In essence, these common men and women are actually very narrow minded and excluding of those unlike them as well rejecting more “enlightened” values and goals of advancement.

The most stinging and hurtful stereotype to me personally at least is the one relating to anti-intellectualism. My family background is mainly blue collar. My grandparents on both sides came from poor immigrant families with nothing, who worked their way up to gain whatever social and economic capital my family has today. My grandpa was a factory worker and my grandma was a house cleaner who dropped out of high school. My other grandma was raised in the Mid West in a farming family who had to grow everything they had in the depression. However due to their sacrifices and saving, both of my parents had the chance to go to college and one to go even further to earn a master’s degree. I have been able to have an easy path to college and higher education and a comfortable middle class lifestyle because of their hard work. My family prized education and sought after it themselves. My maternal great-grandpa fought to keep my grandmother in school after 8th grade even though they told her to drop out as “she’d marry anyways”. My paternal grandpa got his college degree in his 70’s as he never had the chance in his youth but he believed it was never too late to better oneself. I have always been encouraged to prize academics and college was the default plan for me since infancy. I personally always identified as an intellectual who loves to think deeply and critically and pursue a love of the sciences from a young age of my own volition. I look up to the high powered professionals; scholars, scientists, doctors, professors,  researchers etc… I hope to be among their circles in a professional career where I use my mind everyday.

So you can guess why then it is a very personal thing to me to be stereotyped as seen as an anti-intellectual or of some mindset to not go above my social class because of my family’s middle class and blue collar roots and especially as a conservative. My family is made up of common men and women who are not rich elitists and value common sense and street smarts as well as prize education and opportunity for advancement up the social ladder. And they also are conservative. The most shocking thing is though, even more middle class intellectuals and people with higher degrees from a more humble background are starting to think of people from similar backgrounds with that snobbery and disdain as well! For example a professor I once had came from a blue collar working conservative family but had nothing but disdain for Trump supporting conservatives and his blue collar gun-owning father once he got a PhD and entered academic circles. Maybe it’s like the Left’s internalized prejudice concept where the oppressed group internalizes the message they’re inferior.

It’s incredibly alienating to feel that my future colleagues if they knew I’m conservative would characterize me as some backwards anti-intellectual ignoramus! Or to think if I chose a career in the sciences they would think me anti-science because they also stereotype conservatives as anti-science. Or because of the fact I embrace reality instead of “your reality” that means I’d be cold and insensitive as a psychologist. Or because I do think some cultures have more backward values that I believe ours should not embrace or let in the country I’d make a lousy anthropologist. Or because some conservatives don’t accept the theory of evolution they think I wouldn’t either. Or even in the intellectual secular community them not able to reconcile the fact I can indeed be a conservative without religion.

Many conservatives are great academics, smart, intellectual and critical thinkers, they just don’t get the chance to shine among their radical Leftist colleagues. Many are from blue collar working class backgrounds but are far from anti-intellectual ignorant hicks or of a closed mindset in terms of bettering themselves and their children. Intellect can be made of many dimensions, book smart being just one. Common sense goes a long way too and you don’t need letters after your name to:

Want your country and its people to be put first by its leader.

Want your children to be in safe neighborhoods instead of sanctuary cities overrun by criminals and leeches.

Want to raise your daughter to be a lady and son to be a traditional man.

Want to be proactive about the dangers in life, and live in the world as it is, not just what it should be like.

Want real protection in the hands of the common man and woman to protect against the next mass tragedy.

Want to stand up for your heritage and culture and not let everyone else erase and smother the values that give the country its reputation in the free world.

Want your hard work rewarded and others to earn their way as you had to.

Want the truth, not “fake news” and propaganda and lies assuming you are a low information voter.

Want to be known as something more than a “deplorable”.

Amazing it took what many would consider a rich elitist to keep the promises America wanted, really speak to the common man and woman, and help make the country great again…

Image result for leftist elite conservative cartoon

“Then They Came for You…”

Have you ever noticed that people on the Left love to spout declarations that seem not only absurd, and against common sense, but are actually harming their own self interests? One would not be surprised by people trying to push agendas on others, but I am surprised by those who virtue signal statements that actually go against their own self interests! An example to illustrate this is when in college, a number of white students declared that there were “too many whites” at the college! It’s so common place now to see these white virtue signaling Lefties say things like that and declare they’re guilty of their inherited white privilege and cry for reparations for people of color we no longer bat an eye. However really step back and look at it: If anyone actually calls their bluff and institutes these sentiments in practice, not just virtue signaling theory, it hurts the very people espousing these views! Seems illogical doesn’t it?

But then I realized something else: They DON’T think it affects them personally so they feel safe to say whatever they please! Yep. Those white college kids who cried for less white people at my college won’t be removed at all. They got accepted, paid tuition and won’t get their acceptance rescinded because they’re “too white”. They basically can shout “no more whites!” from the rooftops and have absolutely zero consequences as nothing will actually be done to them. It will be the next incoming class who’s affected if the college takes them seriously. But key point here is it won’t be them 😉 This translates into many the issues the Left virtue signals about too. Women getting defensive and enraged at the idea of safety tips to lessen risk of sexual assault? Another example!

These women who want to shut down discussions of watching how much you drink, not dressing provocatively and acting like you want sexual attention, going alone and such probably haven’t had a close call or been assaulted. All the young women saying “just teach men not to rape” have most likely never been raped. To them, actually being the victim they theorize about isn’t all that real of a possibility. Until it’s too late. After all, what woman would rather put herself in real danger of being assaulted as opposed to spreading safety tips that may sound un-PC and anti-feminist but lessen her risk of an actual assault? They can spout anything they want about how the world should be, then declare they will live as it should be, not as it is because they don’t really see sexual assault as something they’re in danger of. To the Left who virtue signals some issue, it’s merely a theoretical exercise. They don’t see how the real life implications and unintended consequences will affect them if their bluff is called.

Funny thing though is, when an issue did affect the Lefties at my school, they jumped on the other side! Many have said they’d support all gender or transgender bathroom bills allowing biological men to use their bathrooms. However, when it came up in my suite one year at college they all said NO to male guests, many who were well known boyfriends and would never hurt a fly, from using our bathroom and made them go all the way down the hall to a men’s room. Why? Because they felt uncomfortable and even scared by seeing a man in their bathroom! So basically they were perfectly fine with complete male strangers coming into the ladies room at the mall whom they had zero clue what he intended, but were okay with not allowing someone’s boyfriend we all knew well from using a bathroom for 20 seconds to pee under the supervision of his girlfriend (male guests also were to be accompanied at all times so we knew who they were with). Yeah, that makes sense…. Or think on this: Girls who spout messages of “I don’t have to do anything to prevent assault, it’s all on men not to rape!” still watch their drinks like a hawk so they don’t get roofied, or don’t walk alone, or may think twice about how they act despite virtue signaling for their peers. When an issue becomes all that more real and personal, they act very differently from what they will say.

It’s just like that poem about when you don’t speak up for anyone else, and then they came for you and no one’s there to protect you! It’s never real until you’re on the other end of it. However like that poem, it will be you one day. Maybe not today, or tomorrow, or next week. But it’s only a matter of time before:

That girl “theoretically” in danger in the trans-friendly bathroom is your daughter.

The school your children attend with zero protection against intruders is the next tragedy in the news.

The house Antifa decides to stand outside and harass has your own family inside it.

The neighborhood that was always safe now run over by MS-13 becomes yours.

The girl at the party drunk in the mini dress is your best friend.

The flight you decided to take is the one the terrorists decide to hijack because security has become lessened as to not offend the Muslim community.

The global warming activism you take on means you can’t drive a car, or take a flight, or even turn your lights on when you need to.

That boy accused of sexual assault on shaky grounds and moral panic is your son.

The criminal benefiting from “justice reforms” and gets off with a light or no sentence had your purse or broke into your business.

That guy laid off due to poor economic sanctions and struggles to support his family becomes you.

When you have to pay the tab for the welfare state, not just your parents.

The baby whose fate is a “choice” making those little kicks you find so miraculous is in your abdomen.

The park overrun by the unstable homeless leaving drug paraphernalia and feces is now the park your children play in.

When your “white privilege” you sincerely believe in causes you to be denied that job, or promotion, or getting into that school or even makes you pay for the mistakes of another all because of the color of your skin.

And that’s by no means an exhaustive list of examples! Who will stand up for your community, your friends, your family, yourself, when those policies you virtue signal to others become the reality and not just a classroom discussion? Who will be there to stand up for your rights and safety when they come for you

Image result for leftist logic cartoon